brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
not ubering you a puppy
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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