Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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