Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
