He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
