The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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