Pants 0. Shit 1.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I need a burrito and a hug.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
