Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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