yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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