okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
