Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
