the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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