If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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