In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
