i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize