can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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