You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
You took a bar mat shot.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize