1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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