Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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