best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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