My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
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