My friends, they love my intelligence
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize