Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
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