She is in my trunk
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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