I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
singing on the bus should be illegal
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.