Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
