dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
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