Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
