shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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