The maid of honor just puked.
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize