I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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