apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
