I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
