In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
