Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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