Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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