I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize