It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
