I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
