You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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