even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I just want nice things and good sex
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
