is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize