So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
