just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize