Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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