Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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