she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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