she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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