They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize