I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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