but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
