You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
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Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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