Nicole vs. Life
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize